Don A: "It's never too early for whipped cream."

ELS: "Evie, do you want some de-caf coffee?"
Evie: "Oh, I have no business drinking de-caf."

The San Franicisco Chronicle: "The Giants, who are one and nine, have left more men in scoring position than Paris Hilton."

Eve: "Hey John, where'd you get that push up?"
John: "From the freezer. It must be old, it tastes like garlic."

Big Wig: "Sometimes I like to play Art Director."
Art Director: "Sometimes I like to play Head of Global Communications."

RR: "Dustin, your birthday is coming up. We're going to get the birthday squirtguns out and the birthday spanking machine."
DF: "I don't want to hear about no spanking machine. Does it have the initials JEM?"

Ericka (hearing Mark and Patty talk about Gary Coleman): "Oh, I love Gary Coleman. He's so hot!"

Anon: "Theatre is life; film is art, television is paying the rent."

VB: "Today I've had two Wuyi Rock Green teas, one hot green tea, and an iced green tea beverage. So much anti-oxidizing activity is happening in my blood that I'm going to be a glowing sphere of health."

MA: "You don't have to worry about the virus. You have a mac."
SJ: "Yeah, isn't it nice to be dumb?"

Uncle Mike: "Remember ... you get viruses from people you don't know."