JP: "I may not have a very good memory, but every now and then something sticks in my brian."

JR: "All the ladies had a crush on the cameraman. But four of the most unattractive women you've ever seen. And overweight! I don't know if they all eat lard in Atlanta or what."

DS: "Why do all you elderly people like Nora Jones?"

MM: "Hug it out, bitch. Hug it out."

TW: "If video programs were hamburgers ... you are the secret sauce."
AN: "And I'm just the pickle on your bun."

Anon profile on Match.com: "I can hold my own. And sometimes yours too."

AN: "When I get too hungry then I stop to function."

LW: "You can't just boss men around like that. Like, how you going to tell a man he can't touch the windows. That's just weird."

NP: "I'm sorry about tonight. I guess I'm not going to go. I've been on the fence all day. And by fence, I mean couch."